When Should Your Adult Children Pay Rent? . . . A poll

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Allkindza
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Posted Wed Oct 1, 2008 10:22PM

Hi


I was wondering if you (reader) would care to render an opinion to a few questions. I have reasons for my asking but I am just curious as to what others think. I am not making it Muliple choice but Please keep your answers short and make any comments at the end of your post but keep your response first so If it gets enough replys I shall try to figure out the results when the thread dies.


1. At what age should an Adult Child (18 Years or Older) Living at home and NOT a Student be required to pay "rent" above and beyond what they are spending themselves.


2. Any thoughts on what the amount of rent should be? A fixed dollar amount that is arbitry or a percentage of the household expenses or what?


3. Are you in this situation yourself or just expressing an opinion?


 


Thanks for your thoughts
Plougmann
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 12:59AM
/
/I got two girls over 18 living at home. They both pay after the same system: The first 283.12 USD they earn is their own. Then they pay the half of the rest they earn for rent at home, but with a higest level at 471.86 complet.


My oldest daughter is study, but have educational aid: She got 452.98 USD/month, and pays 84.93 for rent/month. My other daughter got at full time job and earn 1604.32 USD/month. She is paying 471,86.


In our family you are a grown up member, when you are 18, because in Denmark it means that you are entitled to a monthly income.


We are a standard income family.


I hope it makes sense.. My english isent so good,sorry.

(Edited on 2008-10-02 02:19:01 by Plougmann)
jeangill
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 2:09AM
/
/1. From the start. It's easier that way than changing the rules after they've been freeloading for 2 years!


2. Depends on what their income is, whether unemployment benefit or a wage. For me, the principle is that the child should have a realistic view of what rent costs, the parent should not be put of pocket but rather benefit from the arrangement financially, all this dependent on helping your child make the transition to being an independent adult so I would DISCUSS it with my child till we found something that seemed fair to both.


3. No, but have 5 grown-up children, including steps. We don't have a lot but have helped adult children (I mean in their 30s) financially when needed and we would want our kids to come to us when in trouble - better still, avoid trouble by talking beforehand.


Questions for you, which affect everything else; do you want your kids to stay living with you or not? Do they contribute in other ways to the practical running of the house? How does it work for the whole family if there are other people involved? (I had my mother-in-law living with us for 3 years till her death) I love my kids dearly - all of them - but I like MY independence and our life as a couple, just us! so I'm glad they left!


eta damn - I forgot - one of them did!!! She dropped out of the education system at 18, paid a fixed rent that the two of us agreed was fair, while working, then decided to go to university after all... no rent during holidays. If they worked during university hols then that was their money, but university support is a whole different discussion. And when I was a student, my parents took rent money from me when I worked during hols but that was another generation (1970s) and girls often weren't even allowed to go to uni

(Edited on 2008-10-02 03:45:02 by jeangill)
CaroleGomez
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 2:34AM

1) As soon as they are in employment


2) A fixed percentage of their income. I think using a percentage of the household expenses is a little unfair as they have no control over your lifestyle choices and how much they cost. The percentage they pay would depend on the normal average of disposable income (wages left after household expenses) for your country. I'd say a contribution of 40% of their income is fair for here (UK). Although, if they agreed to save another percentage for a deposit on a property in the future, I'd be willing to negotiate down   (let's face it, you're likely to have to stump up some of that deposit anyway)


3)Life opinion
bekibutton
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 4:53AM
/
/1. I started paying rent as soon as I was working full time.


2. I think we agreed a 'round number' percentage (probably 20% or similar) of my earnings, seem to remember paying £100 a month at the time (a few years back), my siblings paid a round number percentage when they started working too.


I think my rent at the time just went into my parents' savings account and they spent it! Lol.


Now I pay £200 a month which covers bills etc (along with my bro's £200/month) but then I am also paying a mortgage on about 1/3 of the house (long story)....


3. I am the offspring still living at home! Gotta love the UK property market wink

(Edited on 2008-10-02 04:54:31 by bekibutton)
PrairieArtProject
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 5:53AM

My son just turned 18. He'll be in college in the fall, but he will be getting financial aid and he will be paying a little towards rent then, as he plans to continue to live at home. Maybe $100 a month.


Our plan is to use his rent as a savings for him to fall back on when he finally moves away. He himself is not a good saver and needs to be pushed in that direction.
PickStock
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 7:22AM
My kids are long gone. But I told them when they were 15 yrs old, if they dont go to school at 18 then they better be ready to be out the door on the day of thier 18th birthday. Well, one went to school, and two went to work at 18.

(Edited on 2008-10-02 07:32:35 by Curt_Pickens)
JessicaFMoore
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 7:35AM

Just thoughts -- my kids are only 7 and 5, but I think kids these days are so oblivious of money issues so we've already got them getting allowance and holding responsibilities like giving to the church and buying food for their pets. It's very interesting to see the things they choose not to buy when it's their own money they're using!


I agree with Tracy on the whole college issue -- college is such an expense -- I might make a creative requirement like 'at home on the holidays when you're earning money you need to take what you would have payed toward rent and pay that towards your student loans,' but that's me, I'm big anti-debt these days.


Financial counselors I've read say living expenses should be 25-35% of take-home.


Do you want them to be at home or do you want them out of the house and on their own? How long do you think is reasonable for them to stay home? If you don't mind them staying indefinitely, I would negotiate a reasonable rent that raises as their income raises and ensure that they're always contributing to the household income. If this is a temporary situation and you want them out, maybe requiring them to save money so they can get out would be the better bet. You could require they pay a certain amount a month into an account so that they would have the money for a down-payment on a little bungalow type thing in a certain amount of time.


Dave Ramsey has financial information for teens...


I'm such a rambler...I'll stop now.
yingyang0
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 8:00AM
Posted By Allkindza:
1. At what age should an Adult Child (18 Years or Older) Living at home and NOT a Student be required to pay "rent" above and beyond what they are spending themselves.

2. Any thoughts on what the amount of rent should be? A fixed dollar amount that is arbitry or a percentage of the household expenses or what?

3. Are you in this situation yourself or just expressing an opinion?


 


1) Once they're out of high school and not in college then they should be paying rent.


2) It should be a fixed dollar amount that is set according to what the normal rent is your area is. You don't want it as a percentage of income or lower than the market rate because you don't want to provide an incentive to living at home or getting just the mininum job necessary.


3) No. When I went to college my parents had a 500 mile rule, I had to go to a school at least 500 miles away, and they made it clear that living at home after graduation was not an option.
GreenPimp
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 8:08AM
It depends on what age the parents will stop giving their children money to visit them at senior living.
diane39
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 8:30AM
Posted By GreenPimp:
It depends on what age the parents will stop giving their children money to visit them at senior living.



^^Ha!^^


   My son is living with us right now after he graduated college. He's had a part time job while he looked for something full time (not easy when you're an English major!) He's paid us a paltry amount of "rent" while he lived here, which we plan on giving back to him as a security deposit for an apartment when he moves out. Looks like he now has a line on a job and all this family togetherness will end in the next couple of weeks.


YAHHOOOOOOOOO!!!!!


oops. Did I say that out loud just now?
PrairieArtProject
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 9:13AM
Posted By diane39:
He's had a part time job while he looked for something full time (not easy when you're an English major!)


I really hated reading that.


Signed,


Sad English major
Lobo
Mask of the Diablo Azul - Member has won between 1 and 3 Steel Cage matchesThis user has the power to wield the BanHammer, a weapon forged in the fires of hell for that get-off-my-planet quality you can't get anywhere else. You betta reckonize.Forum Moderator
Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 9:53AM
Don't make them pay rent, make them pay the moprgage. Alternate months. That will move them into an affordable apartment in no time.
sylvanworksCLOSED
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 10:04AM
I left home when I was 17 and paid my way ever since (including college). No need to freeload after they are old enough to be considered an adult.
JessicaFMoore
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 10:04AM
Posted By tracyjayhawk:

Posted By diane39:
He's had a part time job while he looked for something full time (not easy when you're an English major!)



I really hated reading that.


Signed,


Sad English major

I married an English major.
RonBailey
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 10:08AM

We have some friends who have a 27-year-old son who refuses to move out.  He's the neighborhood druggy/hoodlum/petty criminal.  When we learned this about a year ago, we did a little research (because our eldest was then approaching age 18).  We found that according to state law (Washington State), unless they pay rent, a person who has been living at a residence is not a "tennant" and thus cannot be legally evicted.  Thus when our eldest turned 18, early this year, we waited a couple months for him to graduate from high-school, then we wrote up a lease agreement and began charging him rent.  We agreed that it would be a small, token amount ($25) as long as he was pursuing education or some sort of a job that had a career-path, otherwise we'd make the rent high to encourage him to get out on his own.  We presented it as a take-it-or-leave-it proposition.  He took it.  Anyway, it was a fairly short-lived arrangement since he violated the terms of the lease last week and as a result, we told him to move-out last Friday.  Not exactly the way I envisioned my kid's "moving-out" would happen, but better than him hanging out doing nothing with his life for years-on-end, sponging off us.  btw: We didn't just kick him out with no options (or money), we found him a room for rent and offered to pay the first-months rent and groceries.  Anyway, we plan on offering the rest of our kids the same lease option when they graduate high school as well.
PrairieArtProject
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 10:15AM
Posted By StekiDesign:

Posted By tracyjayhawk:

Posted By diane39:
He's had a part time job while he looked for something full time (not easy when you're an English major!)

I really hated reading that.
Signed,
Sad English major

I married an English major.


Q: What's the difference between an English major and a large pizza?


A: A large pizza can feed a family of four


(told to me by my orthodontist, who used to be an English major)
RobertH2255
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 10:22AM

1) From day 1.


2) Equivalent amount needed to rent a small apartment.


3) IMHO
underflux
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 10:24AM

I started paying rent at home after graduation. As soon as you stop your schooling and you start working you should be paying rent. IMO.


Which also meant I moved out soon after :P

(Edited on 2008-10-02 10:25:19 by underflux)
CaroleGomez
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Posted Thu Oct 2, 2008 10:24AM
Posted By sylvanworks:
I left home when I was 17 and paid my way ever since (including college). No need to freeload after they are old enough to be considered an adult.


Ditto. You're my kind of kid
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